Not Asking for Much

Today was my first day out of the house since I came home from the hospital last Tuesday. I went for my infusion and if it wasn’t for Ed, I couldn’t have made it. My heart rate shot up, my stomach seized up, I could barely take 10 steps without falling over! I started to cry when I made it back to the infusion room for my bloodwork; Ed had to get me a wheelchair to bring me back! 

I ended up taking a nap during my infusion because it was exhausting. I couldn’t wait to get back home to my chair.

 

I just don’t understand what’s happening to me. The pain in my stomach feels like a cramp, like a hernia or something. When I walk, it seizes up and tightens into a ball. This morning I was heaving again, for the third morning in a row. Not vomiting anything really, just bubbles coming up. And my stomach cramping up. 

I’m tired. Just very tired of being sick. I just want to feel normal again. I want to sleep in my bed. I want to go for a walk. I want to play with my kids. I want to cook in my kitchen. I’m not asking for much….