Tap Out

I determined today not to complain about pain. I was starting to feel a little better as I headed to my eye doctor appointment. My eyes are likely still recovering from chemo. They are dry, very dry, and irritated from my missing eyelashes as well. I have to try drops at least 3 times a day and I will wear daily disposable contacts. Thankfully my prescription hasn’t been altered, even though I’m struggling with blurriness. 

Then I had lunch and things went south…

I fell asleep on the sofa at 4:30 because I was so tired and I woke up feeling so sick.  I felt like someone had dropped some rotten food in my stomach and I burped for 6 hours straight. I even tried to vomit just to make it go away, to no avail. I even cried, with no tears, because I was tired of feeling so terrible. 

Now I just want to sleep and wake up feeling better. I’m just too tired. This is the part of cancer that I don’t like…during active treatment, I knew what to expect eventually and everyone was there by my side helping me along. But I still struggle every day in some way and most people think this fight is over. It’s not… I’m in the ring right now and I’m being knocked down every day. I just want to tap out of this match already.